Is shopaholism a disease of loneliness?
Recently I conducted a small survey of girls with whom I communicate at work and are friends. It turned out that almost everyone considers shopping to be a great way to cheer themselves up. Even if they themselves do not practice it, in principle they consider it the norm. It's better than drinking wine or crying! I dug deeper and discovered a lot of unexpected things. Then we talked about this in the studio of my daytime show with psychologist Elena Shershneva. I highlighted the main thing, I share.
So, shopaholism is not a small female weakness, but a serious addiction… As serious as from alcohol or doping - it can sink to the bottom. Shopaholism occurs when you really miss something important in life, and you compensate for this with purchases.
How to tell if you have this problem. First, when going shopping, ask yourself this question: Do I really need this thing or am I sad, lonely and really, really bad now?? If the second option is an alarming sign. It's important to answer yourself honestly.
Buying things regularly and then returning them is not a good sign. You seem to enjoy the purchase, but you don’t spend money, and you think that it’s not scary. No, you shouldn't deceive yourself.
The third sign is when shopping breaks the harmony in your life - you spend too much time and money on them… Shopping reduces your quality of life and worries loved ones.
And one more fact in the piggy bank. Male shopaholism exists. Here are just men buy status things, acquire what they can not afford, but makes it cooler in the eyes of others. This could be an expensive watch, shoes, or a car. In my opinion, this is a more serious problem, because male shopaholism is able to take away much more money from the family budget.
In order to deal with the problem, you need to admit to yourself: probably something is wrong. Then exhale and honestly say: ok, I'm a shopaholic. And then - to determine where life sags and where I throw things to fill the void.
Elena Shersheva suggests paying attention to 4 spheres: body, contacts, activity, meanings. Checking right now.
- Body: healthy food, we monitor our health (we listen to the body, undergo medical examinations periodically), sports.
- Contacts: with relatives and new acquaintances, loved one, children, parents, colleagues. If you have enough communication, love, human warmth, you are unlikely to shop. When the sphere of contacts subsides, this is the most common cause of addiction.
- Activities - study, work, finance, self-realization in the profession - everything that fills you cognitively and financially.
- Meanings - plans, dreams, spiritual fulfillment, faith.
If the four spheres are evenly filled, we are unlikely to become shopaholics.
So, in order to overcome addiction, psychologists advise you to analyze these areas and find the one that is sagging for you. To fill it up is to find a new hobby, to start paying more attention to the body, in general - to find a different meaning in life - not in stores and things. You can also work out a limit for yourself: I do not spend more than a certain amount per month and more than a certain amount of time on shopping. The main thing is to start working on the problem, and not buying yourself a moment of peace over and over again.
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