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"I don't want anything": what is apathy and how is it dangerous
"I don't want anything": what is apathy and how is it dangerous

"Tired. I do not want anything. I can’t speak or move. I want to hide, and so that no one touches."

Familiar situation? I think yes. Each of us faces this from time to time. Plus to this, somewhere in the depths of consciousness, an annoying thought is spinning that it is also impossible, you have a lot of things to do, and you are in a complete stupor. And here is another "bonus" state - this is the work of an internal controller who gnaws at you: "you must", "doing nothing is bad", "you are somehow not like that." And, all the rest of the energy is spent on an internal dialogue, from the series - "you must" and "I can not." And, from this, well, it is not any easier.

What to do with all this "bunch" called apathy?

Let's figure it out.

Firstly, short-term apathy, which is about 2 weeks, is a natural defense reaction of our body to overwork and stress. And, the good news here is that your condition is telling you it's time to take care of yourself.

Second, you must learn to distinguish between apathy and laziness. What we call laziness in our everyday life, from the point of view of psychology, does not exist. When I'm too lazy to do something, then I can, but I don't want to. And there are certain reasons for this. The main reason is that it doesn't matter to me.

A simple example - it would be nice to put things in order in my computer, but I can do it later and put it off until later. What does this mean? That the need to put things in order is less relevant now than the need to enjoy watching a movie, walking, chatting with friends, or something else. Or - I already find everything in the computer and what is chaos for another is order for me. Those. - laziness, answering the question "why?", Signaling the lack of intrinsic motivation. In this situation, it would be nice to understand the goals, in their priority and understand what is really important for me personally.

the girl has a headache
the girl has a headache

But apathy is a lack of interest in what is happening, in others, in oneself, in fact, it is a lack of interest in life. The danger is that apathy can signal more serious causes than just overwork. These include depression caused by severe stress (loss of a loved one, job loss, disaster), diseases associated with impaired brain function, any diseases that reduce immunity, taking certain medications, any kind of addiction. Therefore, if you notice in yourself or your loved ones:

  • Prolonged depression of mood. Nothing pleases, and this state becomes deeper and deeper.
  • Lack of desire to communicate, and with those people, communication with whom was previously the norm.
  • An insistent desire to retire, isolate oneself from the world, people, “hide in a house”.
  • Lethargy, lethargy, poor concentration of attention, slowing down of thought processes.
  • Fatigue, even if you have slept enough and decreased appetite.

Then, the best solution would be to contact a specialist. A professional psychologist will help you deal with the causes of apathy and make the necessary correction of your condition. By the way, contacting a specialist is useful if even a lot of time has not passed, but you want to quickly get rid of the uncomfortable condition and you need support.

How to deal with apathy on your own?

Since we do not have much strength in a state of apathy and any actions are given with great difficulty, we use the technique of "small steps", filling ourselves with energy.

Breathing technique

Take the most comfortable position for yourself, if you want to lie down, lie down. Focus on your breathing. Feel the fresh air fill you as you inhale and the warm air warm you as you exhale. Breathe smoothly without straining or forcing your breath. Try to inhale smoothly, hold your breath while inhaling, then exhale smoothly and hold your breath while exhaling. Moreover, on exhalation, holding the breath should be longer than on inhalation. The basic rule for holding your breath is the natural, calm urge to inhale. Place your hand on your belly and try to breathe that way. 10 times will be enough, continue breathing in your normal comfort mode. It is helpful to remember and do this throughout the day, especially after sleep and before sleep. The result is a pleasant feeling of relaxation.

Sensation technique

To begin with, try to feel the tips of the fingers of your right hand, as each cell of your hand is life itself, it pulsates and fills with energy. Try feeling two hands at the same time. Enjoy this feeling of life within you. Gradually, if possible, you can slowly move your attention throughout the body, starting from the tips of the toes to the crown of the head, and feel that your wise body thanks you for taking care of it and that you are the embodiment of the warm light energy of life.

girl reading
girl reading

Thought technique

If at this wonderful time of meeting with yourself some thoughts begin to come to mind, do not strain and do not fight with them, just observe. Thoughts come and go, it is a natural process, like breathing or circulation, which happens against our will. We can only observe from the series - yeah, I just thought about it. As soon as we become in the position of an observer, thoughts no longer have power over us, they stop annoyingly spinning in our head, forcing us to worry, they just leave, like waves rolling in and out. Try to smile at your thought, even just slightly stretching your lips into a smile with an effort of will. At first it looks somewhat strange, but we are so arranged that, as soon as you start smiling, the brain has no choice but to bring thoughts in line with the expression on your face. A couple of minutes passed and the mood improved. Remember that the biggest nonsense in this world is done with the most serious expression on your face.

Technique of the moment

You are thirsty. Often we fill a cup with water, drink it, not paying attention to what is happening to us at that moment, doing it automatically. And here's a great exercise. You took the cup and felt how smooth, round, pleasant to the touch. You fill the cup with water, bring it to your lips. Fresh, pure life-giving moisture quenches your thirst. The water is so delicious, feel it as you enjoy every sip. Then calmly put the cup back in place, admiring the perfect movement of your hand. Do not hurry. This is the beauty of the moment. Our life is a series of moments that we often miss, getting hung up on "important" thoughts.

Feeling the beauty of the moment is a return to ourselves to the child, when we were happy with the simplest, but most surprising things for us. These moments remained, but we stopped paying attention to them in the endless adult race. Moments are our life, the past is no longer there, and the future exists only in the imagination, because when it comes, it will already be the present. And, you choose to be happy or sad, accept or reject.

Collector's technique

Collect pleasant things, pleasant memories, people you like, music, books, films. Try to look around you and write 10 things that are pleasing to your eye, even the most simple ones: a vase on the table, a cloud outside the window, a table lamp, a cup of steaming tea, something that has delighted you here and now. Doing this exercise regularly, we will eventually understand that the fabric of our life is woven from many pleasant little things and our task is to learn to notice them.

depressed girl
depressed girl

What can you do to avoid conditions that can lead to apathy?

Developing habits that allow you to enjoy life is well worth it. Our brain remembers everything, so let it be the best.

  • Go to bed until a maximum of 23.00 and sleep for at least eight hours;
  • Allow yourself to rest when you are tired;
  • Do breathing exercises, train your body in the optimal mode for you;
  • To walk outside;
  • Hang out with nice people and avoid toxic relationships;
  • Minimize the chemical effect on our body;
  • Eat right, choosing what is right for you;
  • Protect your brain from destructive and low-quality information;
  • Read good books, listen to good music, watch good films, admire beautiful things, enjoy pleasant little things;
  • Laugh and enjoy what you are;
  • Notice and marvel at the beauty of the world.

Remember the words of the flight attendant on the plane before take off? “First, we put on an oxygen mask on ourselves, and then on the child.” This simple phrase from the instruction has a deep meaning in life - you need to take care of yourself, so that later you have enough strength and energy to take care of others.

Apathy is like a signal on an airplane that it is time to put on an “oxygen mask” of energy and inner resources.


"You yourself, like no one else in the entire universe, deserve your love and devotion."


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