A complex relationship with food is one of the main problems of modern society. And this has long gone simply beyond mechanical calorie counting or sweets.
With food, we compensate for the lack of positive emotions, we try to "seize" stress … Let's look at the reasons and ways to get rid of emotional seizure.
Emotional seizure is a popular phrase today, and the more we learn about it, the more we realize that almost everyone experiences emotional seizure. It's just that some expresses it with a "+" sign, while others - with a "-" sign. But let's take a look at it separately and develop a mechanism for working with each type of jam.
Remember what happened to us in childhood, when we knocked our knees down or Vasya's friend in the sandbox took a paddle from us? We met with the first difficulties and manifestations of our negative emotions, and either started crying, screaming, or with the same spatula they hit Vasya on the forehead. And no matter how inhuman it may sound now, if we had the courage to fight back, it meant that we released our negative energy. And over time, we only needed to learn how to cope with it harmoniously.
But, if we started crying, for example, my mother, in order to calm and please us, would say: "Here, eat some candy." And so it was repeated many times, as a result of which certain associations were fixed in our brain: “Pain = Candy”, “Anger = Candy”, “Irritation = Candy”. Here you can substitute any emotion that you often seize.
However, a person finds himself in a similar vicious circle in the case of food as a reward: “Do your homework, you will get a candy”, “If you finish your soup, you will get a candy,” where the connection is again built: “I'm done = Candy”.
Over time, as we grow older and begin to gain extra weight, we increasingly dislike our reflection in the mirror. Here again our “favorite” vicious circle awaits us: “We get angry because of something in life - we eat up - we start to get angry because we have eaten - we eat even more”. And, accordingly, for our small and big merits, we will also, according to the automatic reaction of the brain, reward ourselves with delicious treats in order to remind ourselves: "I am a fine fellow."
And the worst thing is that, realizing the full severity of this addiction, we bring up our children according to the same scheme and cultivate this habit in them. Remember: never reward your kids with food!
- When exactly was she?
- What is the story behind this emotion?
- How long did you "rush" with her?
- How did you deal with it?
- Were there any impulses to cook something tasty for yourself or order different delicacies to enjoy?
- Also review your recent accomplishments, and remember if there was an attempt to reward yourself with food?
Do you know why we often do not realize that we are seizing our own emotions? Because we ourselves do not know how to identify them. Indeed, instead of teaching us to be aware of our emotions and to verbalize them, we were taught to suppress them, not to speak out, to be silent.
Or remember the moments when our life loses its colors, the feeling of fullness, brightness, we stop living for our pleasure, we forget about ourselves, our desires, interests. Often in this story, it is the sweet that replaces our satisfaction.Indeed, the moment we eat sweets, our dopamine level rises, which gives a feeling of high. However, each time, in order to feel that long-awaited pleasure, more and more sweets are required … Thus, our daily calorie intake becomes higher, and the parameters are wider.
Of course, our parents are not to blame for not knowing how to act correctly. But now we have full responsibility for ourselves, our children and the habits that we instill in them.
How to deal with emotional seizure?
Learn to track / be aware of your emotions. At first, you will become aware of them after two days, a day, half a day … And only after a few months of work, you will begin to clearly understand when you want to show emotion. But to show it or not - it will already be your conscious decision.
Constructively show, speak, verbalize your emotions. Find techniques for working with emotions that are suitable for yourself, learn to apply them.
Tie yourself a red thread. In order not to forget that from now on you are working with your emotional state, tie a so-called "reminder" on your hand (this can be any thread, a bauble). As soon as something negative happens, you will look at the "red thread" and apply techniques for working with emotions.
Track emotions and the urge to bite that accompanies them.
However, sometimes we are faced with a situation when, for example, standing in a supermarket in front of shelves with regular sweets, we cease to control ourselves, our hands stretch out, our head does not understand, and willpower seems to remain somewhere at home.
What to do in such a situation?
- Accept the story that you have just seized your inner pain.
- Asking yourself: "What emotions did I actually experience / feel before I bought all these harmfulness?"
- Asking yourself: "What would I like to actually experience in that story (which brought you the pain that you were trying to seize)?"
- Work out an emotion using any technique you choose.
Of course, this path will not be fast. However, it is he who is faithful. In addition to getting rid of emotional seizure, you will also learn how to manage your emotions, experiences, and acquire the skill to calmly resolve conflicts. And most importantly, you will not be led by the provocation of the brain, which is still acting automatically, but will begin to think consciously. Believe me, in this work on ourselves, we will only win!
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